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なぜ気になる?人の目?

2017/ 09/ 18
                 
A student, sitting to what we call Ikemen guy, was asking if his gkasses look nice.


The Ikemen guy looked annoyed because he did not seem to par attention to the glasses at all. The glassess itself were just plain, common one especially for those who attend a competitive school. Not with a yellow frame. Not with glittering, showy glasses at
all. So why? I was wondering why the naughty boy kept asking the same question so inquissitively. He looked serious.

People want to know how others evaluate them, how people look at them, and how they are judge in the end. When we buy and
puton new shoes, for example, we feel exhilarated and excited even at home before going anywhere. Even when it's rainy out there, we imagine us wearing them on a fine day. That's what getting new things mean. But when it comes to showing them to others and getting high praise, the story is different. We become nervous and alone, thinking " I shouldn't have come out with shoes
today. Wrong choice. Damn it."
In that case, though, we have already know how to cope with the situation. "You see, this is a good buy. I found this by chance
while watching on the 2nd floor. This doesn't look on me, but who cares?" You want your friends to say, "Cool. Why not?" We
better underestimate the shoes or dress on purpose so that we want to prevent disppointment from hitting us.

Back to the boy wanting praise, I have to say to him that he doesn't worry about how others look at you. "We all know your
glasses are nice on you. But this is school. Your classmates are not always your friends. If you keep asking if how you look or not, what do you think will happen? " Some will begin to go away from you. They will find something new in you. You may be going
to be bullied because of such a trifle. Be careful. It is usually difficult for kids to praise their friends. The don't know the
appropriate expressions beecause kids have only a few opportunities to prase each other. Mothers are good at praising, which is
their mportant jobs. Just saying "Good," may be the easist and the understandable words among kids.
The boy understood me. He turned out to be smarter than I imagined. He stopped asking around.

This morning incident made me think why people tend to be extremely aware of how others look at them. Because we lack
confidence? We want others to admit our choice of closthes, car, and house is good. That is how we feel satisfied with good
relationship with others. But is that all?

( to be continued )